During the elementary school years, kids are developing competence (and hopefully confidence) as they compare themselves to their peers. In today's topic we look at Eric Erikson's stages of psychosocial development to identify some do's and don'ts of parenting kids into confidence.

Talking Points:

  • Do encourage. Your kid may want to give up as soon as they think they can’t achieve. Teach them to work at it but don’t overpraise either. Proverbs 12:25, Ephesians 4:29
  • Don’t pressure. Especially in sports or other competitive activities, be quick to encourage fun over being the best.
  • Don’t compare. They are already comparing themselves to others so they don’t need you pointing out where they fail to measure up.
Discussion:
  1. Initial reactions to this topic? What jumped out at you?
  2. On a scale from 1-10, how encouraging are you as a parent? Defend your answer.
  3. How encouraging were your parents to you? How did that impact your development?
  4. How have you seen your kid struggle with comparing themselves to peers academically, athletically or creatively? How have you responded in the past?
  5. Read Ephesians 4:29. How have your words put pressure on your kids? How do they typically react to your comments? What is a better approach moving forward?
  6. How have you been guilty of comparing your kids to their friends or siblings?
  7. Read Proverbs 12:25. How can you help your kid to gain confidence during this stage of development?
  8. Is there a step you need to take based on today’s topic?
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