Our kids will grow up with a particular attachment type – which will impact the quality of their future relationships. Good parents will do everything they can to help their kids form healthy attachments.

Talking Points:

  • Secure parents approach parenting with confidence feeling like they can meet their child’s needs and create a loving bond with them.  Proverbs 22:6, Deuteronomy 6:6-9
  • Avoidant parents approach parenting with some indifference and distance. They aren’t lacking the confidence to be a good parent but they may not be comfortable with a close bond.
  • Anxious parents question if they can be a good parent and tend to create insecure attachments because they are focused more on their own emotions. Ephesians 6:4
  • Disordered parents are inconsistent waffling between an avoidant style and an anxious style. This leaves the kid feeling confused and unsure of their connection to their caregiver.
Discussion:
  1. Initial reactions to this topic? What jumped out at you?
  2. Which of the 4 attachment types describes your primary caregivers? How did their attachment style affect you growing up?
  3. Have you embraced parenting as a welcome challenge or has it brought you a lot of angst? Explain.
  4. Which of the 4 attachments best describes you as a parent right now? Explain.
  5. Read Ephesians 6:4 and Proverbs 22:6. How can a parent’s emotional health frustrate or confuse their kids? What is the task of a healthy parent?
  6. Read Deuteronomy 6:6-9. You can adjust your attachment style. What are some things you can start doing to create more secure attachments with your kids?
  7. Is there a step you need to take based on today’s topic?
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