Trusting someone is one of the most fundamental components of any relationship, be it personal or professional. Trust is the foundation on which relationships are built, and without it, they are likely to crumble. Trust is something that should be earned, not freely given. It takes time and effort to build trust with another person, especially in a marriage.

In marriage, trust is paramount. Without trust, the relationship is likely to suffer. Trust is not something that can be taken for granted, and every spouse needs to work hard to earn and maintain trust from their spouse every day. Trust in a marriage is based on the character of the spouse, not the one who is trusting.

Trust is reactive and measurable. It is something that is built up over time, like a savings account. The more effort and time that is invested in building trust, the greater the return. Trust is also something that can be measured. When someone trusts their spouse, they can point to specifics actions that prove their trustworthiness.

When trust is broken, it can be a painful experience for both spouses. The person who has been betrayed may feel hurt and angry, while the person who has broken the trust may feel guilty and ashamed. This is where forgiveness comes in. Forgiveness is a proactive choice. When someone extends forgiveness to their spouse, it opens the door to restoring broken trust.

In the Bible, Colossians 3:12-13 says, “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” This verse reminds us that forgiveness is not only important but also necessary for any relationship to thrive.

In conclusion, trust is an essential component of any relationship, especially in a marriage. It takes time and effort to build trust, and it can be measured over time. Trust is reactive but forgiveness is proactive. By choosing to forgive, we open the door to restoring broken trust and creating a stronger, more resilient relationship.

Every couple has disagreements, and sometimes those disagreements can lead to arguments. However, healthy couples know that communication is key, even when it leads to conflict. In fact, fighting can be good and helpful if you do it the right way.

In Ephesians 4:29, it says, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” This means that even in conflict, we should use our words to build up and show grace to our partner.

Avoid the Three Unhealthy “Fight Languages”

There are three unhealthy “fight languages” that can derail a conversation and prevent a couple from solving the issue at hand: escalation, withdrawal, and invalidation.

Escalation is when the intensity of the argument increases and becomes more heated. This can lead to hurtful words and actions that only serve to damage the relationship further.

Withdrawal is when one partner shuts down and stops engaging in the conversation altogether. This can make the other partner feel unheard and lead to resentment.

Invalidation is when one partner dismisses the other’s feelings or experiences. This can feel condescending and hurtful.

Healthy Communication Skills

Healthy communicators use “I feel…because” statements instead of pointing fingers at their spouse. This allows each partner to express their emotions and experiences without placing blame on the other. For example, instead of saying “You never listen to me,” a healthy communicator would say “I feel unheard when I try to share my thoughts and feelings.”

One of the most important aspects of healthy communication is active listening. This means truly listening to what your partner is saying without interrupting or preparing your response before they finish speaking.

When your partner is talking, give them your full attention. Make eye contact, nod to show that you’re listening, and ask clarifying questions to make sure you understand their point of view. Repeat back what they said to show that you heard them and understand their perspective.

Work Together to Find Solutions

Once both partners have expressed their thoughts and feelings, it’s time to work together to find solutions. This means brainstorming ideas and finding a compromise that works for both partners.

It’s important to remember that finding a solution doesn’t mean one partner has to give in to the other. Instead, it means finding a solution that meets both partners’ needs and values.