The first and most important principle of parenting is to put God first in your own life. Many parents focus so much on their children’s behavior or happiness that they neglect their own spiritual health.
Your Relationship With God Is the Foundation
We often think parenting is about what we do for our kids, but it actually starts with what is happening inside of us. If you want your children to love God, they need to see that you love God more than anything else. This isn’t about being perfect or following a set of religious rules. It is about a genuine, daily connection with Christ that changes the way you think, speak, and react.
When you make God your highest priority, you are not just checking a box. You are positioning yourself to receive the wisdom and patience you need for the daily challenges of raising kids. You cannot give your children what you do not have yourself. If your “spiritual tank” is empty, you will likely parent out of frustration or exhaustion. By putting God first, you tap into a source of grace that sustains you through every stage of your child’s life.
Matthew 6:33 Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.
The Power of a Visible Example
Children are like sponges, and they observe your life much more than they listen to your lectures. This principle reminds us that our kids are watching how we handle stress, how we treat our spouses, and how we spend our time. If we tell them that God is important but never pray or read the Bible, they will see the inconsistency. Authenticity is the greatest tool in a parent’s belt.
When you put God first, your life becomes a living demonstration of the Gospel. You don’t have to be a theological expert to lead your family spiritually. You simply need to be a follower of Jesus who is willing to be honest about your own need for Him. When your kids see you apologize when you’re wrong or see you turning to God in prayer during a hard time, you are teaching them how to walk with God in the real world.
Deuteronomy 6:5-7 And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength. And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are rising up.
Moving From Child-Centered to God-Centered
In our modern culture, it is very easy to fall into the trap of child-centered parenting. This happens when the entire family schedule, budget, and emotional energy revolve around the child’s sports, hobbies, or whims. While loving our children is vital, making them the “center of the universe” actually places a burden on them that they weren’t meant to carry. It can lead to anxiety for the child and burnout for the parent.
Switching to a God-centered home changes the atmosphere. It takes the pressure off the parents to be the ultimate source of everything and places that role back on God. When God is in His rightful place at the center, the family finds a healthy rhythm. You begin to view your children as “arrows” to be released for God’s purposes rather than trophies to be displayed for your own pride. This shift in perspective brings a sense of peace and purpose to the home that wasn’t there before.
Trusting God With the Results
One of the hardest parts of parenting is realizing that you cannot control the outcome of your child’s life. You can do everything “right” and they may still struggle or make poor choices. This is why putting God first is so essential for your own peace of mind. When your identity is rooted in Christ rather than your child’s performance, you won’t be crushed by their failures or puffed up by their successes.
Putting God first means trusting Him with your children’s future. He loves them even more than you do. As you focus on your own walk with Him, you learn to release your kids into His hands. You provide the environment for growth, but God is the one who changes hearts. This realization allows you to parent with a spirit of invitation rather than a spirit of control.
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.
The Takeaway
Parenting principle number one is simply this: the best thing you can do for your children is to pursue God with all your heart. Your spiritual health is the ceiling of your parenting. By prioritizing your relationship with Jesus, you create a home environment where faith is caught, not just taught. Focus on your own walk with the Lord, and you will find the strength and wisdom to guide your children toward Him.
