The Bible presents marriage as a sacred, lifelong covenant, yet the reality of human sin often leads to the painful question of when a marriage can end. Christians generally fall into one of three camps regarding divorce and remarriage: the view that it is never permissible, the view that divorce is allowed but remarriage is not, or the view that both are permissible under specific biblical exceptions. Understanding these perspectives helps believers navigate brokenness with both biblical integrity and Christ-like compassion.
Position 1: No Divorce and No Remarriage
This is the strictest historical position, often referred to as the “Permanence View.” Proponents of this view argue that marriage creates an ontological bond—a “one flesh” union—that only death can sever. They point to Jesus’ words in Mark 10, where He states that what God has joined, no human should separate. From this perspective, any divorce and subsequent remarriage while the original spouse is still living constitutes continuous adultery.
The strength of this position lies in its high view of the marriage covenant. It takes the “until death do us part” vow with absolute literalness. Advocates argue that the “exception clause” found in Matthew’s Gospel refers only to a pre-marital betrothal period (like Joseph and Mary) rather than a consummated marriage. By holding this line, proponents believe they are best reflecting the unbreakable relationship between Christ and His Church, where Jesus never “divorces” His people despite their unfaithfulness.
Position 2: Divorce Is Permissible, but Remarriage Is Not
The second position recognizes that sin can make living together impossible, but it maintains that the marriage bond itself remains intact in God’s eyes until death. In this “Separation View,” a Christian may be justified in seeking a legal divorce—particularly in cases of adultery or extreme danger—but they must remain single or seek reconciliation with their spouse. This view draws heavily from the writings of Paul in the New Testament.
“But if she does leave him, she must remain single or else be reconciled to him. And the husband must not leave his wife.” (1 Corinthians 7:11)
Those who hold this view believe that while a legal paper might end a civil contract, it cannot dissolve a spiritual covenant. This position attempts to balance the reality of human safety and peace with the biblical command to remain faithful to one’s vows. It allows a spouse to escape a toxic or unfaithful environment without “sinning” by entering a new relationship that the Bible might technically classify as adulterous.
Position 3: Divorce and Remarriage Are Sometimes Permissible
The most common evangelical position today is the “Erasmus” or “Exception View.” This perspective holds that while God’s ideal is for marriage to last a lifetime, certain sins are so destructive that they effectively “break” the covenant, freeing the innocent party to move on. The two primary exceptions cited are sexual immorality and desertion by an unbelieving spouse.
“And I tell you this, whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery—unless his wife has been unfaithful.” (Matthew 19:9)
In this view, the “exception clause” given by Jesus implies that unfaithfulness provides a legal and spiritual ground for the marriage to end completely. Furthermore, when Paul discusses the “abandonment” of a believer by an unbeliever, he notes the believer is “no longer bound.” Advocates argue that if one is truly no longer bound to a contract, they are free to enter a new one. This position emphasizes God’s mercy and the possibility of a “new creation” life after the devastation of a broken covenant.
Debating the Nuances: What About Abuse?
One of the most intense debates within these three positions involves the issue of domestic abuse. Strict adherents to the first two views argue that since abuse is not explicitly listed as an “exception” by Jesus or Paul, it does not warrant divorce or remarriage. However, many who hold the third position argue that abuse is a “functional abandonment.” They suggest that a spouse who beats or systematically demeans their partner has fundamentally deserted the marriage covenant, even if they still live in the same house.
Scripture commands husbands to love their wives as Christ loves the Church and for both spouses to live in peace. When a home becomes a place of violence, the “one flesh” union is being physically and spiritually violated. Many modern biblical scholars believe that the “desertion” mentioned in 1 Corinthians 7 can be applied to any behavior that serves as a total rejection of the marriage vows. In these cases, the church’s priority must be the protection of the image-bearers of God over the preservation of a legal document.
Grace for the Brokenhearted
Regardless of which theological position a person takes, the Bible is clear that God is a God of healing. For those who have experienced divorce—whether on biblical grounds or not—there is no room for shame in the kingdom of God. While the Pharisees used the law to trap people, Jesus used the truth to set them free. If you have been through a divorce, your past does not disqualify you from God’s love or His service.
“He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds.” (Psalm 147:3)
The church must be a place where the sanctity of marriage is upheld and the victims of brokenness are embraced. Whether a person chooses to remain single, reconcile, or remarry after a biblical divorce, they should do so under the guidance of the Holy Spirit and the support of a godly community. The ultimate goal for every Christian is to live a life that honors the heart of God, which is always tilted toward redemption and peace.
The Takeaway
Where Christians should draw the line on divorce and remarriage often depends on their interpretation of the “exception clauses” in the New Testament. Some believe the marriage bond is absolute until death, others see divorce as a necessary protection but forbid remarriage, and many believe that sexual sin or desertion provides a biblical release for both. Regardless of the position, the priority remains the same: to uphold the holiness of marriage while extending the radical grace of Jesus to those picking up the pieces of a broken life.
