Relapse Prevention

Successful recovery happens with a detailed prevention plan.

Warning Signs of a Relapse

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Warning Signs

  • A common saying is that relapse is a part of the recovery process.
    • There may be some truth to this, but full physical relapse is always preventative. 
      • However, physical relapse is very common for people early on in recovery.
        • Because new people to recovery are unaware of the warning signs.
  • It is generally apparent to those with experience when someone is getting close to relapsing.
    • Warning signs:
      • Stop coming to meetings or working with mentor/sponsor
      • Maintaining the same lifestyle as before recovery
      • Not being transparent with people close to them
      • Taking on unnecessary stress (e.g. new romantic relationship)
      • Lack of humility or short-term memory about addictive past
      • Focus on other people or things rather than personal recovery
      • Not taking steps to change their life (Nothing changes if nothing changes)
  • The most destructive outcome of relapse is the shame and discouragement experienced.
    • Prevents someone from being honest and reaching out for help.
    • May cause someone to want to give up on recovery

It’s A Process

  • It’s important to understand that relapse is a process, not an event. There are typically three stages to a relapse.
  1. Emotional: You’re feeling depressed and you’re losing some of your important habits. 
  2. Mental: You’re reliving old stories or even glamorizing the days when you were using.
  3. Physical: You start using again.
  • Emotional Stage
    • Emotions are powerful. And as addicts, we’ve spent a lot of time letting our emotions rule us.
    • Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is how well you know your emotions and how they affect you and those around you.
    • It takes a great level of humility to admit emotions we are struggling with.
    • Some feelings and emotions may seem irrelevant, but they can have a greater impact on us than we realize: (H.A.L.T – Hungry, Angry Lonely, and Tired)
  • Mental Stage
    • When our emotions are in charge, we struggle to think logically.
      • We forget how destructive our past behavior was and begin to fantasize about using again.
    • 2 Corinthians 10:5 – We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ (ESV)
  • Physical Relapse
    • By the time a physical relapse occurs, it’s shocking and confusing to see the path that led to it.

Self-Awareness

  • Be aware of these stages and stop yourself before you get to the physical stage where you’re actually using.
    • Be open about emotional struggles with mentor/sponsor and in recovery groups
      • Even when they seem insignificant.
    • Be honest with yourself by taking a daily inventory.
      • Take note of areas of where spiritual disciplines are waning, like prayer, Bible study, and fellowship.
  • At the end of the day, it’s only our relationship with God and operating in His strength that will give us the discernment we need to stay sober.
    • Philippians 4:7 – And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (ESV)
Talking Points:
  • It’s important to understand that relapse is a process, not an event. There are typically three stages to a relapse.
    • Emotional: You’re feeling depressed and you’re losing some of your important habits. (H.A.L.T – Hungry, Angry Lonely, and Tired)
    • Mental: You’re reliving old stories or even glamorizing the days when you were using.
    • Physical: You start using again.
  • Be aware of these stages and stop yourself before you get to the physical stage where you’re actually using.
Discussion:
  1. Can you give an example when you were hungry, angry, lonely, or tired (HALT)? How did these feelings effect your emotions or thoughts negatively?
  2. Do you agree that relapse is a process, not an event? Explain.
  3. Can you think of any “warning signs” that are going on in your life right now?  What are some practical ways you can bring them back under control?
  4. Can you give an example of a time you “played the tape through in your mind” which kept you from relapsing?
  5. Read 2 Corinthians 10:5. What thoughts do you need to take captive right now?
  6. Read Philippians 4:7. Do you believe that God is interested in helping you?  If so, are you willing to ask for his help?
  7. Is there a step you need to take based on today’s topic?

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Knowing and Avoiding Triggers

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People in recovery need to be careful about handling triggers.

  • Most addicts have experienced, at one point or another, short-term victory over their addiction, only to find themselves right back into it again. 
    • And I’m sure we’ve all asked ourselves, “how did I get back here to this place?”
  • Last week we talked about how relapse is a process, not an event.
    • Emotional, Mental, and then Physical
  • And today, we’re going to talk about the personal emotional and mental elements that can lead us down the track to relapse.
    • We call these personal elements “triggers”
      • Triggers are unique to each individual
  • Addiction triggers are probably one of the most difficult things to understand for the non-addict.
    • Most non-addicts just think an addict should be able to make a decision and simply stop using.
      • They fail to realize that for most addicts, if they could simply choose to stop with a snap of their fingers, they would.
  • Triggers are the reason that recovery itself is a process, not a snap decision.
    • Learning what our triggers are and how to avoid them is crucial in the battle against relapse.
      • Hopefully our conversation today will be helpful not just for the addict to identify triggers, but also for those who don’t understand how addiction works.
  • So, what is a trigger?

A trigger can be anything that brings back thoughts, feelings, or memories that have to do with our addiction. 

  • Anything that can eventually lead us to craving our addiction again would be considered a trigger. And they can be external or even internal.
  • External triggers are the persons, places and things that remind you of the days you used. These need to be avoided at all costs.
    • Examples (from experiencerecovery.com):
      • Being in specific locations (e.g., bars, neighborhoods associated with past use);
      • Spending time with people who actively use drugs or alcohol;
      • Experiencing financial problems or stress from work or other things
      • Experiencing conflicts such as romantic breakups and divorce
      • Emotional occasions such as vacations, anniversaries, celebrations, and holidays
      • Seeing marketing through ads, social media, TV, or movies that is related to your addiction
    • It is crucial to recognize your personal external triggers and be vigilant about avoiding them.
      • Sometimes it takes a great deal of sacrifice to steer clear of external triggers.
        • But we need to put the same amount of effort into our recovery as we did into our addiction. 
  • Internal triggers are the emotions and thoughts that surrounded your desire to use in the past.
    • Examples (from experiencerecovery.com):
      • Feeling lonely or isolated;
      • Feeling overwhelmed by activities and responsibilities;
      • Facing rejection or criticism from others;
      • Feeling powerless in certain situations;
      • Being too hard on yourself for mistakes made in the past;
      • Reduced self-esteem due to the unrealistic portrayal of real life on social media;
      • Hearing songs associated with the addiction;
      • Experiencing strong emotions such as anger or joy;
      • Experiencing intense worry, fear, and uncertainty about sobriety;
      • Frustrated with their progress in recovery.
    • Understanding our internal triggers comes with developing emotional intelligence and maturity.
      • Journaling can be really helpful to recognizing our emotions and how they affect us.
      • We also will require a lot of help from others in this area, such as a mentor or sponsor to talk these things through with.
        • We also need God’s help in identifying areas we cannot clearly see ourselves.

How you can avoid the triggers:

  • Pray. Recognize the temptation and pray for strength to say “No!”
      • Matthew 26:41 (NLT) Keep watch and pray, so that you will not give in to temptation. For the spirit is willing, but the body is weak!”
  • Submit to God. Choose God’s will instead of allowing your emotions and thoughts to lead you.
    • James 4:7 (NLT) So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
  • Stay accountable to a sponsor or mentor. You need someone who can ask the hard questions and hold you accountable.
    • Proverbs 11:14 (NLT) Without wise leadership, a nation falls; there is safety in having many advisers.
  • Change your lifestyle. Create new habits and a new way of doing things.
    • 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NLT) This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!
Talking Points:
  • A trigger can be anything that brings back thoughts, feelings, or memories that have to do with our addiction. 
  • External triggers are the persons, places and things that remind you of the days you used. These need to be avoided at all costs.
  • Internal triggers are the emotions and thoughts that surrounded your desire to use in the past.
  • How you can avoid the triggers:
    • Pray. Recognize the temptation and pray for strength to say “No!” Matthew 26:41
    • Submit to God. Choose God’s will instead of allowing your emotions and thoughts to lead you. James 4:7
    • Stay accountable to a sponsor or mentor. You need someone who can ask the hard questions and hold you accountable. Proverbs 11:14
    • Change your lifestyle. Create new habits and a new way of doing things. 2 Corinthians 5:17
Discussion:
  1. Warm up question: Has anyone shot a gun before?  Can you explain what the steps are leading up to the shot being fired?
  2. How does it make you feel that God wants a personal relationship with you and cares about the intimate details of your life?
  3. Why do you think it would be important to get rid of sin in other areas of your life in order to help you stay abstinent from your addiction?
  4. Read Proverbs 11:14 NASB Do you have someone to help with guidance in your life?
  5. Can you think of a personal internal trigger you are facing or have faced in the past? What is a way you can cope with or avoid this trigger?
  6. Can you think of a personal external trigger you are facing or have faced in the past? What is a way you can cope with or avoid this trigger?
  7. Read 1 Corinthians 10:13 ESV.  How is being tempted different than hardships and struggle?

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Making a Detailed Relapse Prevention Plan

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Benjamin Franklin says “If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail!”

#1 Put God First!

Proverbs 3:6 ESV In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.

The biggest and most important relapse prevention plan is Jesus Christ! How do we put God first? By making a habit of talking to God daily, reading His word, and learning to live a life that honors Him. Chose a time in the day that you can commit to spending time with Him and stick to it.

#2 Change playmates, playgrounds, and playthings

Get rid of any items associated with your addiction. If it’s a temptation or trigger to be around, get rid of it! Don’t think you can go to a bar and just have a soda or hang out with friends you once used with. Find a way to make new friends that support your recovery and relationship with God. Find new healthy interests and activities. Join a local Christian church and ask how you can start serving.

#3 Process the 12 Steps with your sponsor or mentor

If you don’t already have a sponsor or Godly mentor than get one! Start processing your steps using this link to a 12 Steps Workbook. This tool will help you learn, grow, and stay abstinent from your addiction. After you finish a step, you should review it with you mentor or sponsor. If you feel that your problems are more serious, then consider seeing a counselor in addition to having your mentor. All of this will prepare you to help someone else! Helping others will get your mind off of yourself and give you a sense of purpose.

#4 Do your recovery one day at a time

Matthew 6:34 NIV “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

Focus on God today and one day at a time after that. He will give you the strength you need to stay abstinent from your addiction when you seek him first. So don’t worry about tomorrow focus on staying clean today.

#5 Make a plan for temptations

Write down and talk to someone about your personal external and internal triggers. You have to be aware of your temptations in order to plan how to cope with them or avoid them. When you write them down, put an action plan in place. If happens, then I will do what?

You may try to convince yourself you have your addiction under control. But think of your addiction as a big green monster in the closet. He might be put away but he’s in there doing push-ups ready to take you right where you left off if you’re not careful to keep the door shut.

Genesis 4:7 NIV says “If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it.”

Finally, if you do relapse or you already have, don’t give up. God’s mercies are new every morning. If you have put your faith in Jesus, then you are completely forgiven no matter how bad you feel you’ve blown it! Listen to this amazing promise God has made for us.

Isaiah 41:10 HCSB “Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be afraid, for I am your God. I will strengthen you; I will help you; I will hold on to you with My righteous right hand.”

The recovery road will still be hard at times. But each day you turn your life over to God, when you use His wisdom to keep your mind, body, and soul healthy you take one step further away from addiction and one step closer to God.

Talking Points:
  • If you want to have a good prevention plan in place, make sure it has these 5 things:
    • Put God first. Freedom starts with putting your faith in Jesus. Only through his strength can you truly be free of your addiction. Proverbs 3:6 ESV
    • Change playmates, playgrounds, and playthings. You have to remove the places, people and activities that could trigger you to use again.
    • Process the 12 steps with your sponsor or mentor. The 12 steps are helpful and practical for a pursuit towards recovery. 
    • Do your recovery one day at a time. Don’t worry about the past or the future. Just do what you need to do today. Matthew 6:34
    • Make a plan for temptations. Always be on guard for the temptations that come your way. You will be tempted so always be ready for the battle.
Discussion:
  1. Is there a time in your life you should have made a plan but didn’t and your efforts failed?
  2. Read Proverbs 3:6. What do you need to do to put God first in your life? Why is this so important?
  3. Do you think going through the 12 Steps Workbook would be valuable to your recovery? Why or why not?
  4. Have you started to change playmates, playgrounds, and playthings? If so, can you give an example?
  5. Why do you think helping someone else can help your recovery?
  6. Read Isaiah 41:10. How does this verse comfort and encourage you? Why is trusting in your good intentions not enough?

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