Men, we’re in our third week of this 7 deadly sins series. Today, we come to a sin that seems to be at epidemic proportions in our society – the sin of lust. In our highly sexualized culture, we have to be on guard and intentional because this sin is lurking around every corner. It’s looking for ways to make it into your home, your life, and your schedule.
Jordan Petersen podcast talking about how a 12 year old boy can see more naked ladies on his phone in one day than King Solomon saw in his life.
Carl’s Jr. commercials story (Hardee’s in the South East)
Like all of the other lies from the devil, lust is not going to bring the fulfillment you think it is. It falls short. It leaves you wanting more.
Lust is a shortcut to sexual fulfillment, but it doesn’t actually get you there. When you lust after someone, you are objectifying that person for your own selfish pleasure.
- Our culture thinks sexual fulfillment is the ultimate achievement. (It doesn’t seem in scripture that there is going to be sex in heaven, so it’s obviously not the ultimate fulfillment. Not sure if this would be a rabbit trail) It is a blessing from God when used in the context of marriage between a man and a woman, but it’s not the ultimate fulfillment. A relationship with our creator is so much more important and fulfilling.
It is a blessing, however, the enemy has corrupted it. So much so that growing up in the Southern Church, it was either NEVER spoken about or it was “whispered” that is was bad.
“Purity Culture of the Church= Desire is shameful and sexual desire is shameful. IF you are just pure/virgin at your wedding day, ALL of your sex in marriage will be perfect…Then it isnt..The confusion is real
This has caused couples to not talk about it in their marriages and thus the enemy gets an advantage in a marriage to cause division. Yet just the opposite is true. God wants us to have great sexual fulfillment…inside the Marriage Covenant.
Matthew 5 vs Song of Songs. The Church wants to talk Matthew 5 (preached as shame) yet they will not touch Song of Songs (Solomon) where it is seen as a gift from God.
Lust has a bigger impact than you think – physically, emotionally, relationally, and spiritually. It not only skews your picture of sex, but it does so much more.
- Matthew 5:27-30 You have heard the commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’[j] 28 But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 So if your eye—even your good eye[k]—causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your hand—even your stronger hand[l]—causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.
- Physically – distraction, STD or unwanted pregnancy if you act out on the lust,
- Emotionally – objectify women, lack of contentment, feelings of frustration,
- Relationally – betrayal, lack of trust, your wife/girlfriend feels like they don’t measure up
- Spiritually – making this an idol in your life, creating an area in your life where you don’t submit to God’s authority, shame, guilt, not wanting to connect with God because of the sin you’re carrying
- Makes sex all about me – my desires, my pleasure, my wants – According to the Bible, once I’m married, my body is not my own. It belongs to my wife. Most fulfilling sex life is when my wife feels secure, fulfilled, and cared for in that area of our marriage.
- Early Fighter Pilot experience/ Male Dominated career field with lots of vaults to a Christian Commander who made a stand to the culture we have today.
- “What Happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas”– Nellis AFB is the Home of the Fighter Pilot and located in Las Vegas. So, fighter pilots make the “Pilgrimage” and “live it up” there. My experience and the Lord sending a mentor at 3 am in a McDonalds
Lust feeds on secrecy and starves in transparency. The road to healing starts with confession – first to God and then to others.
- 1 John 1:8-10 If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. 9 But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.
- God already knows our sin, even our sinful thoughts and desires. It’s freeing to bring those to him in confession and repentance. We not only confess the sin of lust, we need to confess the sin of not trusting that God has our best in mind in this area of our lives. For some reason, this is the one area where I think most people think God is holding out on them. God is being stingy. God’s not being stingy. He wants the best for you. He wants to save you from wounds – emotional, physical, relational pain.
- James 5:16 Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results
- You don’t have to shout this from the rooftops, but find a couple of guys you can trust that can be your accountability partner. Be careful of sharing too much with your wife, but be honest about struggles.
- My Accountability Brother- Open and Transparent even to the point where he can make a Fighter Pilot (because of our early culture and the male dominance in the field we hear alot) embarrassed….BUT it is how he and I attack it together. He is as open as I am. As such, I have become transparent with other men and my boys.
- Pinto and I with another fighter pilot being transparent. You could see he was still caught in the “Secret Life” and he was speechless at our transparency in our personal lives and in how we dealt with it in the Fighter Pilot Culture
God has given us a proven battle plan to be victorious in this area. It starts with changing the way we think and then the way we act.
- Romans 12:2 Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.
- The world is constantly putting pressure on us from all sides. The word picture of “don’t be conformed to this world” is don’t be molded. It’s like a potter molding clay. He’s exerting pressure on it from all sides. If you do nothing, you’re going to let the world shape you.
- Focus on the worst case scenario.
Steps to Victory
- Confess it to God
- Confess it to a confidant
- Have at least one brother to hold you accountable and have a team of brothers to have your six when you are getting pressured or stumbling (Hollywood and Smash)
- Renew your Mind Every Day
- God’s Word
- Prayer
- Worship
- Fellowship
- Music for me is key
- Eliminate Sources of Temptation
- Apps on phone
- Computer in bedroom
- Going to the Gym
- “Play the dweeb”
- “Look at the floor” / Elevators and meetings”
-Modern Threat (phones) vs old threat (magazines)
- Retrain Your Response to Triggers
- Replace bad habits with Good habits
- Don’t just bounce your eyes, thank God for your spouse if you’re married, for example
This is not a battle that you can win alone. FLEE from lust. “Abort vs Merge” Top Gun 2 Spoiler… Killer at the merge…yet 3-1 says merge is unsurvivable against a modern threat, yet we still go to the merge..the difference is we are not alone!
Get a Wingman/ Battle Buddy! We are all struggling with what the enemy twists and what God wants us to be blessed with. Two Ship min, 4 Ship recommended.
