7 Deadly Sins – Envy

Welcome back to the podcast. We’re coming to the tail end of our 7 Deadly Sins series.  We have two more sins still to cover, and today, we’re talking about envy.  And envy is the most miserable of the sins on this list.  We say that because there is nothing fun or redeeming about envy.  At least with some of the other sins you might experience temporary pleasure, but with envy, there is nothing positive about the experience from start to finish.  It is completely and wholly miserable.  And yet, it not only affects most of us, many of us like to wallow in it. 

How do we know if we’re struggling with envy? Use phrases like “That’s not fair”, “If only I had…” If you diminish the accomplishments of others, i.e. “If I were 6 foot 7 I could play professional beach volleyball, too”.  

This is a sin that starts so early in our lives.  If you’re a parent  with multiple children, you’ve experienced that situation where there is a toy lying on the counter or on the ground and no one is playing with it and everyone is getting along. But as soon as one kids starts to play with it, everyone wants to play with it. And let’s not pretend it stops when we’re children. It just typically looks a little different for adults.  For us it might look like having dinner at a friend’s house and the appliances in their kitchen are newer and nicer than yours.  All of a sudden, that refrigerator and dishwasher in your kitchen just don’t cut it anymore.  You start to think about why you deserve new appliances.  You reason that you make as much money as they do.  You’re a good person. You deserve nice things.  And now, you’re no longer grateful for the appliances you have in your kitchen.  Now to be clear, I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with getting new appliances, but if we’re being motivated to get them because someone else has them, even though our current ones are still working fine, we have to honestly ask “ Is it because of envy?”

Before we get into the first main point, maybe it’s helpful to start with a definition: 

Envy – a feeling of discontented or resentful longing aroused by someone else’s possessions, qualities, or luck

But I would like to modify this definition from a more biblical perspective, to a definition that I think more accurately gets at the heart of what is really going on

Envy – a feeling of discontent or resentment toward God because of someone else’s possessions, qualities, or luck

That’s really what’s happening with envy, particularly for the believer.  We feel like God has somehow short changed us.  He didn’t get it right.  We were the ones who were supposed to get the promotion.  We’re supposed to have the spouse that treats us well. We were supposed to be the ones to be able to have children on our timetable. 

 Early in my career, my wife and I would look at and compare our cars and belongings to others in the Squadron or even our own family.  We were literally “Keeping up with the Jones”.  Often times we would resort to “Retail Therapy” (and we still fight this every now and then) to fill a spiritual need.  This led to debt, stress, worry, and loss of a giving spirit.  Once again, like all the other “Deadly sins” we have looked at, we were trying to shortcut God’s will, design, and in this case, His financial and physical blessings. Then came Dave Ramsey  and his saying of “Live like no one else, so that later, you can live like no one else”.

The first step in dealing with envy is to turn back to the very God who seems to have treated us so badly. Instead of substituting anger for envy, be honest about what you’re feeling.

This is an important place to start.  You might not have consciously thought that you’re really angry with God when you’re envious, but anytime we’re discontent, we’re feeling like God has shortchanged us.  We feel that God is unjust.  He isn’t being fair.  And I hope to say this as gently as possible, but God is God and we’re not.  Our sense of justice, our sense of fairness is tainted by sin.  We have a distorted view of justice and fairness.  Trust me, friends, we should be exceedingly grateful that God doesn’t treat us fairly.  Because if he did, we’d all be destined for hell.  And any time you notice you’re feeling like God has given you the short end of the stick, I would encourage you to look at the cross.  

Genesis 4:3-7 When it was time for the harvest, Cain presented some of his crops as a gift to the Lord. 4 Abel also brought a gift—the best portions of the firstborn lambs from his flock. The Lord accepted Abel and his gift, 5 but he did not accept Cain and his gift. This made Cain very angry, and he looked dejected.

6 “Why are you so angry?” the Lord asked Cain. “Why do you look so dejected? 7 You will be accepted if you do what is right. But if you refuse to do what is right, then watch out! Sin is crouching at the door, eager to control you. But you must subdue it and be its master.”

• We talked about this story when we had our podcast on anger, but today, we want to look at the root emotion that caused that anger – jealousy.  Cain was jealous of his brother. 
• In this gentle confrontation, God tried to help Cain come to the right response.  He tried to encourage him that he would be accepted if he did what was right.  He said that sin was crouching at the door. Up to this point, Cain hadn’t sinned, but he is right on the edge.  Sin is right there ready to pounce.  That tells me that it is OK to question.  In his questioning, Cain hadn’t sinned yet.  There is a space where we can come to God with hard questions about things that are or are not happening in our lives, but we need to come to him in humility and faith.  And we have a choice in those moments to do what is right.  To come out of that on the other end and say, “God I may not understand it, but I know I can trust you. I know you are just.  I know you are good.”
• I’ve had multiple times in my life where I was going through some sort of inconvenience, some sort of trial, and I’ve said, “Couldn’t it be easy, just once, God.”  And I said it in the whiniest, brattiest, most ungrateful voice you can think of.  I went from a question made in humility to a flat out lie.  God has made it incredibly easy for me in so many ways.  He sent his son to die on the cross for my sins and Jesus said his yoke is easy and his burden is light.  He gave me an incredible wife.  My kids are respectful and obedient and a joy to be around.  I’m healthy.  I have the most amazing church family anyone could ask for.  I have it easy in so many ways.  And yet, I have the nerve to ask God if it could be easy just once.  And in those moments, when I come to my senses, I acknowledge that God is so good to me.

We have spoken about the Tornado that destroyed our farm and home six months ago a few times already on the Men’s Podcast.  I can genuinely say we have been blessed by that event.  We been blessed with, as Paul talks about,  a peace that passes understanding.  That is only from the Lord.   However… we are starting to feel a little frustration and looking at other houses a little “dangerously” wanting to short cut the rebuild as the frustration builds with the clean up and construction.  However, we know that He has a plan for this and will use this for HIS glory.  He is definitely working on “Contentment” for both Eugenia and I.  We have to constantly remind ourselves to have a grateful heart and praise the Lord!

The second step is to learn to admire God’s gifting in others – without comparing them with your gifts.

• 1 Corinthians 12:29-31 Are we all apostles? Are we all prophets? Are we all teachers? Do we all have the power to do miracles? 30 Do we all have the gift of healing? Do we all have the ability to speak in unknown languages? Do we all have the ability to interpret unknown languages? Of course not! 31 So you should earnestly desire the most helpful gifts.
• Our envy isn’t limited to stuff.  We might be envious of someone else’s talents and giftings, the position they hold, or the respect they have in our church or community.  
• Instead of wishing we had someone else’s gift, we should be grateful for the gifts God has given us, because as believers, we’ve all been given spiritual gifts.  Most of us don’t even completely realize what our God given gifts are, much less fully developed them.  Or we’re using our giftings for ourselves instead of for the common good of the church.  We have no idea what God can do through us because we’re too busy wishing we had a different gift.  What a waste! We’ve probably all heard the saying, “The grass is always greener on the other side”, and usually we think of that in terms of relationships, but I think it’s applicable here.  If we’d take the time to water and fertilize and weed the gifts we have, they’d be just as green as what someone else has.  We wouldn’t have to look on the other side of the fence.  
• In fact, we could take that a step further.  Instead of being envious of someone else’s gifts, we could actually celebrate them.  I can be thankful that God has given people musical giftings that I don’t have.  I can be thankful that we have people who have some tech savvy to run our sound board and media computer.
• To be a completely healthy, local body of Christ’s church, we need everyone to be exercising their gifts.  You’re needed.  Your gifts are just as important to our church family as someone else’s – whether that’s singing, teaching, leading, or your great attention to detail as you clean the campus, or your warm smile as you welcome someone coming in the door.

I have never an original thought, so to be successful, I take from both good and bad examples to learn from.  However, if I let a spirit of self doubt or pride get in there, I can turn that learning into… I am going to fail because I wish I was a communicator and leader like….. Or could organize my thoughts and express them so beautifully  like…. 

The third step is to question the system of values that says we should envy the wealthy, famous, and beautiful. God looks on the heart, not the outward appearance. 

• Isaiah 53:2-3 My servant grew up in the Lord’s presence like a tender green shoot,    like a root in dry ground.There was nothing beautiful or majestic about his appearance, nothing to attract us to him.
• This is a Messianic prophecy.  This is talking about Jesus.  
• And I think at the heart of a lot of this is – do we value most what God values most?  Take beauty or the idea of physical perfection, for example.  Think of how invested our society is in trying to achieve that – the billions and billions of dollars that are spent annually trying to hit this target of “beautiful”.  Which is a moving target, by the way.  What was beautiful 100 years ago isn’t the same today and what’s beautiful today won’t be 100 years from now. This is just not a value to God.  The bible says physical training is of some value.  It also says our body is a temple, so we should care for it.  Exercise is good. But when we become so focused on looking a certain way that just isn’t important to God, and more often than not, it distracts us from things that are important to him.
• 1 Corinthians 1:26-29 Remember, dear brothers and sisters, that few of you were wise in the world’s eyes or powerful or wealthy[g] when God called you. 27 Instead, God chose things the world considers foolish in order to shame those who think they are wise. And he chose things that are powerless to shame those who are powerful. 28 God chose things despised by the world,[h] things counted as nothing at all, and used them to bring to nothing what the world considers important. 29 As a result, no one can ever boast in the presence of God.
• I love how God’s kingdom is upside down from the world’s kingdom.  So often God tells us that the things the world thinks are important are rubbish.  The world values physical beauty – God doesn’t care.  The world values celebrity and fame – God values those that are despised by the world.  The world values power – God chose the powerless. God uses people who by and large are considered nobodies by the world.  The result is that Christianity is not about elevating people.  It’s about elevating God.  God deserves all the glory and honor and credit.  He is the central figure in the story, not us. 
• 1 Timothy 6:6 Yet true Godliness with contentment is itself great wealth. 
• Contentment is not just about money and material things.  It’s the attitude of being happy with what you have in all areas of life.  It’s being happy with who you are and who God made you to be.  A content person recognizes that everything they have is from God and that God is good.  God’s plan for our lives can be trusted.    I want to honor him by doing the best I can with what he has given me.  I don’t want to waste time and energy by whining about what I don’t have.  And there’s no enjoyment in it.  As we said at the beginning, Envy is the one sin on this list that has nothing pleasurable in it.  It simply leads us to bitterness, anger, depression, frustration.  

Are you missing God’s call for you based on your envy/ pride/ comparison to others who are gifted/ designed differently, or are you properly using the talents / design of how God made you?