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Based on book by Dr. Leonard Sax “Boys Adrift”

Dr. Leonard Sax, a family physician and psychologist, has spent decades researching a troubling cultural trend: boys in America are becoming increasingly apathetic, while girls continue to thrive. College enrollment numbers are down, motivation is plummeting, and a growing number of boys seem to be disengaging from real life. What’s going on?

A Look at the Numbers

College statistics reflect the shift. In 2023, men made up only 42% of students aged 18–24 in four-year colleges, down from 47% in 2011. Women were 9 percentage points more likely to be enrolled in college than men in 2022. And when boys do go to college, they are less likely than girls to graduate.

Brain Development and Early Education

Brain development plays a role, too. Girls’ brains mature faster than boys’, especially in areas related to sensory integration and self-regulation. This biological reality clashes with today’s academic environment, where even kindergarten demands early reading and writing skills—before many boys are ready.

5 Key Factors Behind the Crisis

According to Dr. Sax, several powerful cultural shifts over the last 40 years are affecting boys in ways that parents and educators can no longer ignore. Dr. Sax identifies five key factors that are contributing to this downward spiral:

1. Early Education Isn’t Built for Boys

Kindergarten used to be a place for creativity and play. Now, it focuses on reading, writing, and sitting still for long periods—an environment where many boys struggle. Instead of adapting the system, society too often labels boys with ADHD. The CDC reports that over 11% of children aged 5–17 have been diagnosed with ADHD, often as a result of mismatched expectations rather than true disorder.

2. Video Games Offer an Addictive Escape

Many boys say school is boring and can’t wait to get home to their video games. These games offer fast-paced stimulation and constant action—but research shows they also increase risky behavior, diminish empathy, and disconnect boys from real-life goals.

3. Overuse of ADHD Medications

Stimulant medications like Adderall and Ritalin can alter motivation and personality by impacting brain receptors. Dr. Sax recommends non-stimulant alternatives like Strattera or Wellbutrin, warning that reliance on the wrong medications may do more harm than good.

4. Chemical Hormone Disruption

Modern plastics and water contaminants act as endocrine disruptors, mimicking estrogen in the body. This not only affects puberty and hormone development in boys but may also contribute to rising ADHD rates and declining motivation.

5. Lack of Strong Role Models

From sitcoms to social media, positive portrayals of fatherhood and masculinity have disappeared. Instead of men leading homes with strength and integrity, pop culture often portrays dads as clueless or absent. As Dr. Sax says:

“Manhood isn’t something that simply happens to boys. It’s an achievement.”

Without strong guidance, boys grow up lacking a sense of purpose, responsibility, and identity.

Solutions for Parents

  • Rethink how you educate your son.
    Use movement and hands-on activities to make learning engaging.

    1 Timothy 4:12 “Don’t let anyone think less of you because you are young. Be an example…”

  • Set boundaries around video game use and encourage real-life engagement through chores, hobbies, or church involvement.

    1 Kings 2:2-4
    “I am going where everyone on earth must someday go. Take courage and be a man.
    Observe the requirements of the Lord your God, and follow all his ways. Keep the decrees, commands, regulations, and laws written in the Law of Moses so that you will be successful in all you do and wherever you go.”

    Colossians 3:23
    “Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.”

  • Don’t accept an ADHD diagnosis at face value—seek professional evaluation and educate yourself on alternative treatments.
  • Limit exposure to plastics and other hormone disruptors when possible.
  • Find mentors who embody biblical manhood.
    Help your son grow in responsibility and confidence as he matures.

    Proverbs 27:17
    “As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.”

Final Thought

Raising boys in today’s culture is challenging—but with intentional effort, prayer, and community, it’s possible to help them thrive.

Talking Points:
  • The world is training boys to sit still and fit in, but God designed them to move, explore, and lead. When boys are pushed too early into rigid academics, we risk crushing their natural curiosity and drive.
  • Video games offer fake victories that leave boys feeling empty. Real fulfillment comes from doing hard things that matter—serving others, taking responsibility, and walking with God. Colossians 3:23
  • Masculinity isn’t toxic—it’s sacred when rooted in godly character. Boys need to be taught that becoming a man means embracing courage, sacrifice, and faith. 1 Corinthians 16:13
  • Culture mocks strong fathers, but Scripture celebrates them. We need to elevate godly men who protect, provide, and lead with wisdom and grace. Ephesians 6:4
Discussion:
  1. Read the talking points above as a group, including scripture references. What are your initial thoughts about these points or about the podcast lesson (see audio above)?
  2. What examples have you seen of boys struggling in school or life due to boredom, video games, or other distractions? 
  3. How have you (or people you know) responded to an ADHD diagnosis in boys? Were other options considered? 
  4. Read Micah 6:8 and 1 Timothy 4:12. What does it look like to raise a boy to become a godly man? How do these passages guide us?
  5. How has culture distorted the image of fathers and men in leadership? 
  6. What practical steps can parents or mentors take to guide boys through a healthy transition to manhood? How does Proverbs 27:17 encourage intentional discipleship?
  7. What role does the church play in equipping the next generation of boys to thrive spiritually, emotionally, and socially?