Watch the video above and talk about it with a group or mentor. Learn more.

There are some important do's and don'ts when having a disagreement with your spouse. Learn what you should do if you want to resolve your fights in a healthy way.

Key Points:

  • Seek God’s will together as husband and wife. We are one flesh with our spouse (Genesis 2:24). If there’s a serious disagreement, slow down and think and pray about it. (1 Peter 3:7.)
  • If there’s a conflict with your spouse, go to them first (Matthew 18:15). 
  • Give your spouse the freedom to invite others in (Matthew 18:16-17).
  • When there is conflict, seek God’s word, humble yourself, and widen the circle of accountability (Hebrews 10:24-25).
  • The goal of marriage is that you would pursue oneness in Christ. 

Quote This:

1 Peter 3:7 (NIV) Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

See Also: Communication, ConflictMarriage

Talk About It
  1. What is your initial reaction to this topic? What jumped out at you?
  2. What are some ways you’ve handled disagreements with your spouse in the past? How did it turn out?
  3. Read Genesis 2:24. How does this verse apply to seeking God’s will together? How does keeping God in mind help you in times of conflict?
  4. Read Matthew 18:15. In your opinion, how does this verse apply to marriage? What is a constructive way to bring your frustrations to your spouse?
  5. Read Hebrews 10:24-25. How do these verses apply to turning to the church community or “widening the circle” of accountability? What are some examples of issues that might benefit from widening the circle?
  6. What are some situations where it might be wise not to invite others into a marital conflict or disagreement?
  7. What would you say is the goal of your marriage? Why?
  8. Write a personal action step based on this conversation.