This topic is adapted from the Joseph Solomon YouTube channel.
What are the possible benefits and pitfalls of male and female friendships?
Video Highlights:
- There are certainly some issues to be aware of when going into a platonic friendship with the opposite sex. The risk is that one will develop romantic feelings for the other which can greatly change the dynamics in the relationship.
- The issue isn’t if it’s wrong or possible to be friends with the opposite sex. The issue is really thinking about it the right way. You have relationships with your siblings who are of the opposite sex. But that relationship is safe because you know that it’s inappropriate to have a romantic relationship with a family member. You need to have the same mindset with friendships, especially if you’re married. You would have to know that anything beyond friendship would be inappropriate.
- If you don’t feel like you can keep the appropriate boundaries, then it’s best not to pursue relationships with the opposite sex.
- Having opposite sex friendships can be really insightful as you gain the perspective from the other sex. But, the downside can be sharing intimate things with someone who isn’t your mate or a potential mate.
Opposite sex friendships can be complicated and should be handled with great care. Have appropriate boundaries in place and constantly evaluate if the friendship is healthy for both parties.
Discussion Questions:
- Watch the video together or invite someone to summarize the topic.
- What is your initial reaction to this video? Do you disagree with any of it? What jumped out at you?
- Do you have friendships with the opposite sex? How did those friendships develop? What have you gained from those friendships? What have you lost?
- What are some typical complications that can occur in opposite sex friendships?
- What are some appropriate boundaries to have in place for these friendships as a single person? What about for a married person?
- How can you gauge if you’re doing opposite friendships well or not?
- Do you agree that if keeping appropriate boundaries in place is hard for you that it’s best not to pursue these kinds of friendships? Explain.
- Write a personal action step based on this conversation.
