Having any kind of conversation can be stressful but having a hard conversation with someone can be downright terrifying. But, if you go into it with the right motives and a clear plan, even a hard conversation can go well.
Talking Points:
- Before you confront someone, make sure you prayerfully consider your motives and what it is that you want to say. Ask yourself these questions:
- Is my heart to help or hurt this person?
- Are my concerns petty and personal or for their good?
- Am I willing to be gentle and humble?
- Am I the right person to have this conversation?
- Your perspective is just one view on the matter. The person you are preparing to confront also has a perspective and you should be ready to hear it before you form any major conclusions. Proverbs 15:2, Proverbs 18:2
- Start with affirming words. Then, let the person know that you have something you want to share with them and invite them into a conversation. Galatians 6:1
- Be prepared that the person’s initial reaction may not be great. Give them room to have a negative reaction and be patient through that. Keep the conversation focused on the concerns and don’t react to their negativity.
Discussion:
- Initial reactions to this topic? What jumped out at you?
- What are some typical fears you have when you realize you might need to confront someone?
- Have you confronted someone in the past and it went terribly wrong? Explain. How about one that went well? Explain.
- Have you ever been confronted by someone? How did they do it and how did you respond?
- Read Proverbs 15:2. Why is it so important to check your motives before you confront someone?
- Read Proverbs 18:2. How can you tell when someone wants to hear your point of view? Why is hearing all perspectives important to the process?
- Read Galatians 6:1. Why is humility a vital ingredient for having a productive conversation? What happens when humility is absent?
- Is there a step you need to take based on today’s topic?
